Are people more generous online than in the real world?
photo credit: …:::PaparuchaS:::…
It’s surprising and refreshing to confront the kindness of strangers. People in the online community, some I’ve met and more that I haven’t, have been hugely supportive and generous toward me and this project. Offering business guidance, marketing support, site development, collaboration and friendship.
However, there is one act of generosity that stands tall above the rest. The biggest single act so far, is without a doubt, from my developer, Peter. (UPDATE – he screwed me over – not for money but through time wasting and not completing the task at hand!)
So far, he’s invested well over 1000 hours (UPDATE – was this just talk to excuse the time wasted?) on this project in return for payments that only scratches the surface of that input. I often wonder at how this came to be.
After 6 months of developing this site with an Indian company it became clear the work wouldn’t be finished to an acceptable standard. I needed someone new to finish the job. This is when, having spoken to developers, it became apparent that the script, the foundations of the site, were not as robust, streamlined or scalable as I was lead to believe. I met with a lot of freelancer developers and designers; and contacted companies both here in the UK and the US. I also posted my story to an online Forum asking for guidance. This is how Peter and I first met.
6-8 weeks later I was finally free of the Indian developers and had the complete script which I sent to Peter and some other developers. The news was bad. The script was worse than expected. It would be easier to start again rather than to clean the existing code. Peter offered his services and kindly agreed to help by assuming the lions share of the work – because, as he put it, he felt sorry for my predicament, he liked the concept and he liked me. This really was the answer to my prayers – a lifeline for the site, when the alternatives were prohibitively expensive.
My previous development experience with India should have been enough to return me to my senses – to play it safe, “just get the site built!” There were lessons learned and it’s only now that I see how unconventional my current arrangement appears to be. On reflection, it’s not what many of my peers would have done. But then a rich life is full of adventure, calculated risks, and leaps of faith – is it not?
Peter, my current developer, is based in the Canary Islands – some 2000 miles away from me in London. I have not met him – I’ve only seen a photo on Facebook. This is not a regular set-up and one that has it’s moments of hardship – for us both. When ideas meet reality, or the dreamer meets the developer, there will often be tension as a compromise is reached. Mix this with the roles of benefactor and beneficiary and you have a complicated contradiction of social norms.
On the one hand I am incredibly grateful, hopeful and slightly confused – after all, society teaches you to be mindful of such benevolence – the ‘what’s in it for him’ syndrome. Such acts of generosity are rare in today’s world; and as such all the more important and disarming. Difficult to sometimes believe or accept at face value. On the other hand I’m captain of the ship and as such demanding, opinionated and pushy. The result is a complicated and interesting relationship.
Today I read in a book, “Learning to trust that God had the best plan for us was very hard”. This made me think – here’s Peter, the answer to my prayers, and yet I still pray for the site to be finished. Maybe I’ve forgotten how lucky I am to be here at all.
The time it’s taken to get to where I am today has almost blinded me to the good things that have. The modern world pushes us to strive for what we want rather than appreciate what we have. So for that lesson and you help so far, Peter, I am very grateful.
